A Crush on a Friend (2)

Jack felt sorry for what he had done. He wished that he could fix the relationship with Joe. No matter what he did, Joe tried to avoid him and ignored him or tried to make fun of him. Joe told him that he no longer wanted to be friend with Jack. He left Jack with no choice. The only thing Jack could do for the moment was to forget Joe and everything related to Joe. After some time, Jack became better. Though he couldn’t totally get Joe out of his mind, he could live his life without Joe.

One year had passed. Jack continued his usual life. The man whom he wouldn’t have thought of seeing again suddenly appeared. It was Joe! Joe came to Jack for an apologize and felt sorry for what he had done. He knew that he used to have a good friend who had done a lot of things for him. Jack was a bit relief to know that it was after all not his fault alone. However, a glass which used to be broken wouldn’t look perfect as before. Jack felt ashame of who he was, and Joe would think about the thing he had done when they met each other. They could be friend, but they couldn’t be best friends any more.

A Crush on a Friend

It is one of the greatest miserable things for a gay man to fall head over heels for other straight guy, especially if that straight guy is one of his best friends.

…It happened…

Jack (a closet guy) and Joe were not only classmates, but also best friends. Jack never showed his true feeling to Joe since Jack knew that something bad might happen between them if Jack told him how much he loved him. He tried to do everything for Joe, and he would always love to.

…Thing didn’t stay the same forever…

Sometime in 2005, Joe started feeling uneasy about how much Jack had done for him. He kept asking Jack why Jack did all of these for him though he didn’t do anything in return. After a few times of asking, Jack decided to tell Joe the truth. Jack’s premonition was right. Day turned to night. The sky was full of dark clouds. Jack felt a deep paint inside his heart. Joe no longer wanted to talk to him, nor to see his face. The only thing he could do was to cry. It was not the first time that Jack cried, but that night was the most miserable night for him. No one to be there for him. He had no one to talk to. He knew that time would cure the pain, but first he had to spend many sorrowful night.

[... to be continued ]

Stranger

In early July 2008, during my short term job, I met a foreign guy who was spending his holiday in my country.

It was the first time I’ve ever spent my day with a stranger. He was outgoing and friendly and used to travel a lot. We’ve been walking together when we arrived at a place where we wanted to have a thorough look. Normally he would riding his (rented) bike, and I would be on a motor-taxi to the next place we wanted to visit.

The day went on so fast, and the sky was full of dark clouds that we couldn’t manage to see sunset together, and since it was my last day there, I couldn’t have another chance to go around with him.

I knew that nothing could happen between us. All I hoped was to have the last dinner with him. Yet, I had to spend the last dinner time together with myself.

I wrote to him and hoped that he could see beautiful sunset the next day.

From that day, I lost contact with him. I had no idea what happened to him. His photo albums were left untouched since several months ago.

I hope that he’s living happily with his love one.